Finding Someone to Marry

Sam Adeyemi
Proverbs 18: 22
      One of the most important decisions a person will ever make is the choice of a life partner. Wisdom, not money, is the principal requirement needed for building a home. If you are looking for the right mate, become the right mate! Prayerfully create a hypothetical picture of your future and work towards becoming the person in that picture. You are the most important factor in that picture because you are the magnet that will attract the vision.
       Wisdom is synonymous with maturity, and maturity is a major requirement for marriage. Maturity will help you recognise the right person. Drawing a cue from Jesus' life as recorded in Luke 2:52, maturity is needed in four fundamental areas. 'And Jesus increased in wisdom (mental development) and stature (physical development) and in favour with God (spiritual development) and men (social development)’.
        Marriage ought to be a union between two mature people, mature in the four fundamental areas. Firstly, spiritual maturity is needed before getting married and this can be determined by our ability to hear from God, obey God and the capacity to trust God, that is, living based on God's word even when circumstances run contrary. Secondly, mental maturity, which is getting an education, developing a skill and improving our sense of judgement. Learn a trade before getting married.
         Thirdly, social and emotional developmental is needed before marriage, emotional intelligence and tact, the ability to deal carefully with people. Finally, physical maturity - age is a factor, you must be old enough. With a vision of the future and maturity in the four areas mentioned above, we grow to become the person in the vision, and this defines the kind of person we will marry because, ultimately, we attract who we are and not what we want.
       At this point, determine what your values are and go after a person with similar values. In Proverbs 31:1-9, a woman tells her son to define himself with the values that will guide him in life and the choice of a life partner. Finally, prayer will guarantee success in the choice of the person to spend the rest of your life with. After you have found the right person, ask your friends and relatives to pray with you; and if you are in Daystar, enrol for our counselling classes.